My Next Life
Arizona Free Press
← Back to
Humor Me
I want to live my next life backwards.
You start out dead and get that out of the way.
Then you wake up in a nursing home feeling better every day.
Then you get kicked out for being too healthy.
Enjoy your retirement and collect your pension.
Then when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day.
You work 40 years until you're too young to work.
You get ready for High School: drink alcohol and party.
Then you go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, and you have no responsibilities.
Then you become a baby, and then..........
You spend your last 9 months floating in peaceful luxury under Spa-like conditions --- central heating, room service.